I open with a confession. It has taken me nearly three weeks to write this. I hope I have done so in a way to honor those involved while sharing the joy of this experience. This was a mixed batch of emotions for me and found it difficult to write for a while.
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I once wrote, “How do you say ‘thank you’ to someone you do not know and may never know? I answered my own question with the only
answer I could assemble at that time, “You just pray, giving thanks to God,
from whom all blessings flow.”
Right?
It worked for me then, and in
fact, I was satisfied with it . . . until I wasn’t. Something was still missing.
It’s been almost 14 years since
I received my liver transplant, and eight years since I wrote my last ‘Thank You’
letter to a donor family whose identity I’ve yet to learn. I wrote three
letters within the first five years of my transplant, sending each through the
proper channels, hoping for a returned response expressing their desire to meet me and to know how
their loved one changed my life.
I’ve had to accept it’s just
not meant to be this side of heaven.
But as they say, God works in mysterious
and wonderful ways.
I received a phone call last
summer informing me that I had been chosen to ride the Donate Life Rose Parade
float for the 2015 Rose Parade. As far as travel goes, our cross-country
expeditions consist mostly of circling through our neighboring states. World
travelers—or even country travelers—we are not. Due partly to the extra wings
on various hospitals that we were regularly funding.
To be chosen to ride the Donate
Life float in the Tournament of Roses Parade was an honor I could not and would
not miss. I had been watching the Rose Parade since I was a child when Mom set
the television to the parade while she and Grandma fixed New Year’s dinner. It
was tradition. I never would have imagined I would ever have had an opportunity
to ride IN the Rose Parade.
IT’S
FINALLY HERE!
Monday, Dec. 29th - When the day finally arrived,
before leaving the house en route to the airport, we prayed not only for safety
in our travel, but I always pray before leaving the house that God may in some
way bring opportunities for me to encourage or inspire someone in need, and always
bring glory to Him.
Little did I know, that "someone in need" would me me.
Tuesday
Because I can easily overdo, I was very protective of
the parade morning and wanted nothing preventing me from
this amazing opportunity, so I opted out of the offer to help decorate the float, and
instead watched as others meticulously placed spices, fruit, beans, petals, and
flowers onto the design. Others tenderly crafted floragraphs of their loved
ones—something I had never seen and cannot even write without
getting choked up all over again.
JUDGING DAY
The Life Share CEO told us at a
Rose Parade meeting held in early November that the Donate Life float always
attracted the largest crowds, and indeed, I couldn’t believe the number of
people that gathered on that Wednesday morning-- the day before the
parade— Judging Day.
Small segment of those inside the building as the float set outside on Judging Day. |
Riders and walkers assumed
their assigned positions on and around the float that had been moved outside the barn
in which it was constructed. Filling the building now was row after row of folding
chairs filled with those whose lives were changed one way or another by organ
donation. Many were family and friend of donors whose floragraph graced
the skillfully decorated spine of each book on the float. Others were family and friends of those whose lives were spared or improved by a donor.
As I sat in my designated
place, just inches from my back were the book spines and floragraphs,
giving me the opportunity to look closely at the materials used for various
colors. A green book on my right caught my eye. From a distance, it just looked
green, but up close, I could see it was long green leaves of some kind,
reminding me of the leaves on corn stalks.
My spot |
Click pics to enlarge |
As an artist, I love detail and
have always admired the beauty of God’s ingenious designs in plant life, but then
my eyes caught something even more beautiful. In the middle of the book was the
floragraph of a handsome young boy, with eyes that pierced my soul. My heart
broke for a family I didn’t know, and this precious face captured me. There was something about this face!
Click for amazing detail. |
After the judges finished their...well...judging, the crowd of mixed emotions made their way to the float to visit with
riders and walkers, as well as to finally examine the elaborate detail of the float. A
young man approached me whose eyes I thought I’d seen before—so kind, so
tender, but with a hint of sadness. From his chair inside the building, he had noticed my attention to the book on my right.
“That’s my son.”
My heart fell into my stomach.Click for his story. |
He held out a button bearing
the same picture as the one on my right whose eyes had just captured me.
'No wonder I
thought I’d seen those eyes before'.
“I would be honored to wear the
button,” I replied, and thanked him for the opportunity. We spoke a little more
after disembarking the float and snapped a pic of me and my new friend
from New York.
Me and my new friend, Mr. Vega! |
But God wasn’t finished just
yet.
Desperately trying to hold back tears. |
Any event such as this, where
from the minute you arrive to the moment you leave, there is a whirlwind of
activities and not a lot of time for reflection. The schedule consisted of
dinners, a fancy Gala with dancing (which I had not done in years), and tour
(in lieu of decorating), souvenir shopping, the Rose Parade, of course,
followed immediately by the Rose Bowl game. Exhausted from the day that began
at 4:00 a.m., we left the game at halftime, and I said goodbye to so many to whom
I had grown so close that week. And the tears began to flow...
And flow…
Now that the activities were
over, with no need to reserve energy for anything else except the trip home, so
many emotions now began rising to the surface.
A New Story to Tell
Friday, Jan. 2, 2015
Thinking I surely hadn’t
purchased enough souvenirs, I visited the hotel gift shop while my husband
checked out. So many of the guests in the hotel that week were associated with
Donate Life and the Rose Parade and so the gift shop clerk asked about my
experience. I told her the short story of my transplant, but now, I had a new
story I was eager to tell.
I began telling her about the
special button I proudly wore through the parade, but didn’t get very far as the
tears began to flow again. With a comforting hug, she expressed her thanks for sharing that tender moment with her. I
shared the story again with the woman seated next to me on the plane and the
tears flowed again. I called my mom to tell her about the trip and my new story
and, once again, tears.Why can I not stop crying?
Once we finally returned home, I
was able to decompress in my own space, spend some quiet time with the Lord, and
begin to process these new feelings... and these tears that wouldn't stop.
But the tears, I learned, were like healing
oil. The overflow of a heart that could no longer contain all that God had poured into me that week.
There are no coincidences with God. Only Divine purpose.
God, in His love and kindness,
gave me a beautiful gift that week. I can only imagine the smile on God’s face the morning I prayed before our trip for an opportunity to encourage someone in need, while in that
moment, knowing that, 'Daughter. It is you who are in need.' He was already orchestrating the very healing that I needed, to fill a void and brokenness
of which I was not even aware.
As I mentioned earlier in the
post— I had to accept the fact that I
would never learn of my donor or meet my donor family. But, God chose an individual
from the Eastern Time Zone to bring healing to someone from the Central Time Zone by crossing
our paths in the Pacific Time Zone. Chance meeting? Hardly.
I learned after returning home that Mr.Vega had never received any letters from those whose lives were either saved or
changed by his son’s precious gifts. Though this individual was a
donor father and I was an organ recipient-- opposite sides of the organ donation spectrum, so to speak--our
feelings were very much the same. We both shared a void we longed to
fill.
So we decided to adopt one another—he as
my donor family, and I as his son’s recipient, by proxy.
Healing comes in many forms and so often when we least expect it.
It was such an honor to ride
aboard the Donate Life float in the 2015 Rose Parade; an experience I will cherish forever. Not just because it was an amazing opportunity; that's a given, but because I simply would have never imagined how life changing the experience would be for me when God used the event to bring healing to two separate individuals through the eyes of one child.
"Now to Him who is able to do far more abundantly beyond all that we ask or think, according to the power that works within us, to Him be the glory in the church and in Christ Jesus to all generations forever and ever. Amen." - Eph. 3:20-21
“You have anointed my head
with (healing) oil;
My cup overflows.” Ps. 23:5
My cup overflows.” Ps. 23:5
How Great is our God!!
Below are additional pictures of the week. Hard to get them in order on this blog. Click on any picture for detail or more information.
Oklahoma LifeShare CEO Jeff Orlowski |
7:30 am- the morning of the parade and it's 34 degrees in Pasadena, CA! What's up with that? I wore 4 layers under the coat and a pair of leggings under my jeans. |
Parade starts in 20 minutes. I thought we left this weather in Oklahoma. |
My husband and I standing in front of my spot |
Judging Day |
Amazing detail of butterflies, one of 60 on the float |
My riding buddy, also from New York. Click for more. |
Materials used on the Donate Life float. |
Picture taken of the television by a friend during the parade when they found me |
After the parade. Boarded at about 7:15. Got off at 11:30. Nearly 6 mile parade |
2015 Donate Life Rose Parade team- Riders and Walkers |
Decorating |
Float is fully built and painted. Workers only decorate with materials |
Worker gently gluing a single petal in place on the wings of a butterly |
Tuesday Tour Day. Walked around the park and took in sights |
And there's the Good Year blimp! |
Exhibit Hall Ballroom - Gala held here |
He cleans up really nice, huh? |
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